.pink, pink, blue.

Well, It's a been a whole year since I have written anything. Mainly because there's really not that much to tell. oh wait. I had another baby! A boy! Hooray for a penis.
But my goodness, I will not be having any more children. Ever! 

I actually handled the contractions like a boss, often laughing and making jokes with Brett and the midwife in between. I was so comfortable but they kept telling me to change positions. Get down on all fours, stand up, lean forward. Shut up! I just wanted to lean back, sit in my chair, suck down that wonderful gas and kick my husband during every contraction. This seriously got me through. With them coming every 2 minutes though, I was exhausted and asked for an epidural.

Now, I have had 2 children already and the births were quite calm due to the epidural. The anesthesiologist came and put that glorious, glorious needle in my back. Contraction after contraction, the needle was still in my back and he kept fiddling around. Needle came out. Boo!! Needle goes back in, comes out, goes back in and comes out again. Fourth time lucky? yeah? No. I just started crying. This baby was coming out and coming out fast. 

With no epidural like I had planned, I had to push. Let's just say that I can not believe that women have more babies after giving birth without an epidural. If you haven't had kids, imagine the most excruciating pain you could ever feel and times it by infinity. And that 's what birthing a human feels like. I even bit Brett. 

I felt a massive relief when his (didn't feel) tiny head came out. That was the easy part. What I didn't notice was the cord was actually wrapped around his neck and the doctor was struggling to get it off. What I should also mention is that his heart rate was dropping with every contraction. They were starting to worry a bit and I may have needed to go for a c-section. I started yelling at the midwives to literally pull him out of me. There was no way I could push anymore. I had absolutely no energy. Everyone had stern words to me and told me to shut up and push. Finally, he came out. No cry. They put his limp little body on me and Brett cut the cord. I felt like I was in shock a little bit because I just didn't know what I was doing. He had a heartbeat but hadn't taken his first little breath because he was also in shock. It felt a lot longer but a minute later and teeny tiny cry was heard.

I love photos but the photos of me just minutes after giving birth should be burned. Brett and Koa look great. You know those women who look amazing and are so full of life just after giving birth? I am not one of those women. I look like a bus, train and car all hit me consecutively after not sleeping for a year.

Little Koa Lennox (batman) Haddad was born May 13 2013 weighing 3.5 kilos. He is a little champ and totally completes our family. I tell you what though, if this experience was my first, Harly would have been an only child. Brett will be getting a vasectomy, I will be getting my tubes tied and I think I'll also go on contraception. Just in case....


But good luck if you're pregnant :-/

Harly, Harper, Koa & me