At the end of 2014, I was level Britney in 2007.... For 19 months, I had 3 kids on my own, no preschool (long story); a husband who was new to real estate sales and worked 6 days; and let me tell you, it was fucked up. I was fucked up...
It all came to a halt at the end of last year when I had a panic attack in the shower. I thought I was dying from a heart attack. I started to blackout, I had a tight chest and was hyperventilating profusely.
Normally I wouldn't share this stuff, but I wanted to let other people (especially mums) know that it's ok to break down sometimes. Not britney style though, that shit's cray.
Being a Mum is the most overwhelming, most emotional job on the planet. Yes, we get to play at the park/go to the beach/sit at home on Facebook; but there is so much more to being a stay at home Mum.
There are tantrums, tears, food thrown, no showers - and that's just me... The kids are far worse, I swear....
There are two things in this world that I can't handle:
1. When people tug/pull on my clothing.
2. Being pushed/shoved/kicked - especially when I'm sitting down.
I can't help it but I lose my shit when either of these things happen.
And guess what?
MY KIDS DO BOTH OF THESE THINGS 78 TIMES A DAY..... 7 DAYS A WEEK.
No wonder I lost my shit.
Every Mum is different though. We never know what will make us crack under pressure, until it happens. My problem was that I tried to be the strongest possible version of myself - and I failed. When people offered help, I denied it; when in actual fact, I needed it the most. The biggest lesson I've learned out of my little meltdown is that it's ok to accept help.
Friends are like family and if like me, you don't family near you to help - friends are family. Accept their help and have a break.
Don't be a dickhead and try and do everything on your own. Count on the sisterhood! And if you see another Mum struggling, BE that sisterhood! Help each other, love each other and if you see a Mum on the verge of a breakdown, help her.
I will never forget the time a random Mum helped me carry my screaming children to the car. I was on the verge of tears, everyone was staring and I had no control over the situation. I thanked her so much that we finally laughed together at how kids can be assholes.... I will never forget her. #sisterhood
Help one another, love one another, be kind to one another.
You never know what is going on in someone else's life. They could be on the edge of a breakdown....
Peace and love to all
You, me + 3
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