My favourite moment of this year (and probably of my life), is when another parent heard me whisper 'fuck off' under my breath before I answered my child. We had a brief moment of locked eyes and I didn't know if she wanted to fight me, until she smirked at me. I then held up my coffee (vodka) in a cheers motion.
I know I'm not alone.
For example:
This
Is
Flour....
FLOUR! This mum is a fucking legend and I like her. I literally lol'd at this photo for a good 5 minutes. I know that her kid is being an intentional asshole lately so instead of always yelling, she was smart and out-assholed him.
Mum 1 - toddler - minus 1
And this time.
My little asshole thought it was funny to climb up the window, before he realised he didn't know how to get down (insert sniggering here)
Naturally, I was an asshole and laughed while I took a photo of him suffering #assholeparents
I've said it many times, parenting is hard work. Yes, it's fun and rewarding and kids are greaattt bla bla bla, it's fucking hard. My son has given me concussion, a black eye etc... It's tough. And you know why? Because it's unrewarding, unless you out-asshole them.
My son reached for wasabi peas the other day. I smiled, waited and watched. My friend tried to stop him, I said 'no, let him try it'. I must admit, he was extra assholey that day. Needless to say, he learned his lesson..
Me: 1 - son: 0
#outassholed
I spent majority of 2014 drunk. I have a lot of anxiety built up over the years. No, I'm not proud of it and yes I was self medicating.... But, this year instead of self-medicating, I am going to be smart and continually out-asshole my children.
My new favourite activity is doing a dance when I say 'no' to something... It's usually a tap dance, or sometimes I do Madonna style, whatever; it's fun!
I know kids are unintentional assholes because they're kids and they don't know any better..... It's still fun to out-asshole them
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