.mum life - part 2.

Today, I genuinely asked another Mum at school drop off, if I could send my son back to where he came from and have him back at around the age of 4 (ish). He is currently sitting on the couch next to me, playing with his willy, watching frozen. I don't know what emotion to feel as I am numb. I am numb to the constant abuse; emotional abuse, physical abuse and never being able take a shit on my own.

Being a Mum is a tough gig. It's tough because we cop a lot of shit, put ourselves last and don't get as much support as we need. I'm usually an emotional mess (Thanks hormones) and some days, I honestly can't handle being in public...

What childless people don't understand is that we put our lives on hold so we can put our child's lives first. Let me tell you, it fucking sucks! But no one talks about it, and it's not fair!!! 

No one talks about the times that they want to slap their child for calling them stupid. No one talks about the days you sit and cry in the shower because you feel like a shit ass parent who can't get anything right! No one talks about how frustrating it can be to get up 7 times a night and end up sleeping on the couch so you don't cop a bottle to the face.

Everyone sugar coats shit and I'm tired of it. I understand that I have been given a gift that some women haven't - to bear children, and I am 100% grateful for that. I am NOT complaining, in any way. I just want people to know that it is NOT easy. 

Your laundry will forever look like this: 

And I've done 2 loads of washing TODAY!! My house is only tidy when I have visitors and trust me when I say that it kills me!

Your lounge room will look like this:

Only 5 minutes after it was spotless.

People may think that this blog is about complaining about my life, but it's not. I love life (today I hate it). Yes, it is hard but I would NOT trade it for the world. The way my daughters eyes lit up when I was able to go to her school carnival - priceless! But then she ruined it by screaming at me because she didn't want to go with me, she would rather go home on the bus with her friends.

All those times my son scratches me, bites me, slaps me, shoves me; worth it when he wakes up every morning and gives me mega kisses and cuddles!!! 

But then he ruins it by emptying the bunny litter on the floor and I just want to slap him. But I'm a good Mum so instead, I throw an empty milk bottle at him. I still love him but he can seriously be an asshole sometimes. I just cut up some cucumber for us to share and half way through eating it, I realised he pissed in it. Fuck. My. Life. 

Oh and he just took a shit on my foot. 

It seriously is the best; to have kids. I truly cherish it, even though it's the hardest experience of my life, I love it. 

They really do test us to the limit but I'd rather have a kid with a bit of sass than a boring ass kid who acts like they're in the military from day dot. I like the sass, I like the swearing (sometimes) and I especially love the rumbles!!!

It's ok to feel shit sometimes. As Mothers, we all feel it from time to time and it's OK to ADMIT it! It doesn't mean we love our children any less! If anything, it means we care. We want to be the BEST mother we can possibly be! Even if it includes drinking wine every night!

Love to all..... #mumlife

You, me + 3